Tired of waiting for that cute guy/girl to ask you out? Did you recently go through a break-up? Who needs ‘em anyway!? Especially when there’s someone else who really gets you: your pet! Here are 9 ways to enjoy Valentine’s Day, date night, and any other "romantic" time with a snuggle buddy who will never betray you.
A good cry never hurt anyone. If you have a dog, you’ll be able to sob together and comfort each other. And if you have a cat, at least one of you will be having a good day.
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Just because you’re single and lonely doesn’t mean your pet has to be. It’s time you stopped leaning on them and helped get them back out there! Just don’t post any pictures of them licking themselves.
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This one takes some commitment, but the payoff will be amazing. John Oliver set a great precedent when he replaced the Supreme Court Justices with dogs. Why not re-enact the Gettysburg Address using your iguana in the role of Lincoln? Or cast your guinea pig as Vito Corleone in the wedding scene from The Godfather?
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If you don’t know how to knit, then this is the perfect time to learn. Nothing says “I’m totally stable” like spending hours crafting something your dog would rather bury in the back yard along with your slippers.
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While all those gross couples are out taking Instagrams on their Valentine’s Day dates, you can arrange a professional photo shoot with you and your pet. Save them for this year’s holiday card or send them out right away.
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Like the taste of dog treats? Who are we to judge? (Weirdo.) But this is a fun activity that you and your pet can do together. Pinterest has hundreds of recipes for vegan-paleo-gluten-free quinoa kale treats so you can keep your dog on that totally inappropriate diet you insist on.
Image Source: myrecipes.com
Like knitting, there’s never a bad time to learn how to paint. Remember, George W. Bush took up the hobby after he left office. And don’t be discouraged if it isn’t great – your pet will still love you. Unless it’s a cat.
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Kitty Kardashian. Charlie Chat-lin. Actual Dog the Bounty Hunter. The possibilities are endless. Take pictures and hope they go viral so more people will love you.
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Just because you’re single doesn’t mean your friends are. Offer to pet-sit for them while they’re on their dates, and throw a party for their animals! Then, refuse to answer the door when they come to pick them up and live forever in solitude with dozens of animals until this becomes you:
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Good luck! And remember: just because you don’t have a human date on Valentine’s Day doesn’t mean you’re not cuddle-worthy.